2012-10-26

[三十一] 再次

     Heh, single life.  Familiar? Certainly.  Did I miss it the past eight months.  NO   College life has been going pretty well.  Classes aren't too bad, yet.  In a couple days, I'm going to have the first draft of an essay due.  The problem is, I literally haven't written an essay since 11th grade..  Senior year English class was somewhat of a joke..  Simply put: I have no idea what the hell I'm doing with this essay.  D:
Hopefully, my writing hasn't degraded past 8th grade level just yet..
     Anyways, back to the opening topic.  Single life.  Yeaaa.  I'm not one of those "bounce back quickly" type of people.  Needless to say, the past few weeks were a bit tough to pull through.  A couple weeks ago, I think I developed a little crush on someone I met here.  Realizing this put me in a kind of emotional toilet bowl.  Except the toilet was clogged, leaving me to swirl around in my problems without any hope for some sort of closure coming.  The worse part of it has been the guilt.  It hasn't even been a full month since the break up, yet I acknowledge that I now have genuine feelings for this new person.  It feels too soon to me.  It probably is too soon, so I feel even more guilty.  The feelings haven't died.  Oh yes, and remember I'm not a bounce back type of guy.  So of course I still have those days where I wake up with this extreme longing to "go back to the days". or uhh.. something along those lines.  As a result of this, I haven't really tried to make any moves with her. I wouldn't want her to be the "bounceback girl"..  ahhhhh  overthinking  >_< If anyone that happens to read this can give any advice, I'd be happy to take it.
     Aside from that, I'm finally writing in a journal more often (not counting this blog).  The journal is written completely in Chinese to help me practice.  I'm also deciding on a new language to start here at UCI since they can't place me into the appropriate Chinese language class this school year.  Possibly Korean or Japanese.
     Well that's all I have to write about really..  I need to stop writing really weak concluding sentences for these blog posts..  My writing skills are already very self disappointing.  x)  Bye

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